Life, New Year New Me

Why I didn’t make a New Year’s resolution…

When December 31st comes around, most of us are eager to start a new year.  For some, the current year brought nothing but heartache, for others something in the next year is making them impatient (this was my case).  Of course, this day is the day to party, spend time with loved ones, watch the ball drop, and, of course, make those New Year’s resolutions.

I had been a firm believer of New Year’s resolutions.  For the most part, I kept the resolution generic – read more books, be happy, lose weight, but as the year carried on, I realized that it was absolutely impossible.  Life kept me busy so it was harder to do things for myself, I love food too much to really care how much I weigh, and being happy was such a generic and lose concept, I really had no idea what the guidelines were.  Of course, I always try to be happy so I can safely assume I followed through with that resolution.

For me, 2014 was a pretty hard year.  I had some ups and downs and as we got closer to the end of the year, my life seemed to be getting back on track for the most part.  I am on my last quarter of college and applying to go to a 4-year, I have an amazing job that I love, and I moved in with my fiance.  My fiance and I lead a chaotic and busy life.  So busy, that I apparently had no time to think about a New Year’s resolution.  That was until New Year’s Eve, about 20 minutes before midnight.

At first, a sense of anxiety came over me.  I had NO resolution.  How was I supposed to do better in 2015 if I had nothing to base it on.  As I sat there, it suddenly hit me that if I needed a resolution that I hastily make at the end of the previous year to have a great next year, I am leading a pitiful life.  This is not me saying that whoever makes resolutions are pitiful, because they aren’t.  For me, I shouldn’t have to feel like I have to make a resolution to have a great year.  A great year is made because I make it a great year.  I spend as much time as I can with my family and friends, do things I love, and love as hard as I can.  If I want to make myself a better me, I should just do it.  I don’t need a resolution to motivate me.  I should motivate me.

Because of this, when my mom turned to me and asked if I had a resolution, I happily replied ‘no’.  All my anxiety and stress about the new year went away.  I don’t have an expectation of how the year is going to turn out, I am going to take whatever the year throws at me in stride.  Let the year be full of unexpected surprises, happy memories, and sad moments.  Let’s not let the new year motivate us, but ourselves.

Lastly, at the end of the year, instead of focusing on those resolutions that we feel guilty about because we stopped working on them after January, let’s focus on the happy memories and the moments of the year that put us where we are today.

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