Parenting, Uncategorized

My Daughter’s First Boyfriend

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My daughter announced to me on Valentine’s Day that she has a boyfriend.  I was absolutely shocked because, for one, my daughter is one of the most innocent people I know.  The idea of her having a boyfriend was something I hadn’t expected to deal with for a while.  For another thing, my daughter is six.

Yes, my six year old daughter informed me that she had a boyfriend and she was going to marry him.  I figured I would have to dance carefully around this subject because, knowing a woman’s heart, I imagined she’d be quite protective of her beau.

This is the conversation that unfolded:

Daughter: Mom, I have a boyfriend.  His name is Jude and I’m going to marry him.

Me: Is that right?

Daughter: Yes.  He sits next to me in class and he calls me his girlfriend and I call him my boyfriend.  I love him.  He’s so handsome.

Me: Aren’t you a little young to start dating?

Daughter: Well, we’re not DATING.  I’m going to date until I’m 16 and have a car.

Me: So you just call each other boyfriend and girlfriend then?

Daughter: Yep.  We gave each other special valentines too.  He gave me my favorite candy and I gave him two tattoos instead of one.

I thought for a bit about using this opportunity to give “the talk” about how she isn’t going to date until she’s married and she shouldn’t be thinking about boys but then a few thoughts crossed my mind.

  1. She is just calling him her boyfriend.  I remember when I was a year older than her I had a “boyfriend” too.
  2. She is at least sensible enough to not date until she’s 16 with a car.
  3. If being boyfriend and girlfriend means sitting next to each other in class and exchanging special valentines I think I can survive.

I feel that letting her have her boyfriend in all its innocence isn’t a bad thing.  In fact, I find it completely harmless (until innocent kisses are involved).  In fact, until she’s really old enough to distinguish what having a boyfriend entails, which I am hoping will be when she’s actually old enough to date), I think I might let this play out and chuckle to myself when she comes home with stories of her boyfriend.  Plus, who am I to stand in the way in case they really are going to get married.  It’d make for a great anecdote at their wedding.

What are your views on “boyfriends”, “girlfriends”, and the real thing?  What are your rules on dating involving your young ones?  Comment below!

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